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©2017 by Eric Tomme for Seamonkeymusic

The Pink Album

WE LOVE BOOBS!

 

We Love Boobs, yeah, yeah, yeah!

We Love Boobs, yeah, yeah, yeah!

We Love Boobs, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!

 

You say that life’s a joke, Yeah you think that no one cares

But that’s just blowing smoke, Cuz you’re well endowed upstairs!

And We Love Boobs!!    You can always count on that

Yeah we Love Boobs,    So it’s good that you’re not flat!

 

Now please don’t think we’re rude, That we’re heartless and uncaring

But it’s all that we can do,   To keep ourselves from staring!

Because We Love Boobs!  And it’s not a passing fad!

Yes, We Love Boobs, And you happen to be stacked!!  
OOOH!!!

 

We Love Boobs, yeah, yeah, yeah!  

We Love Boobs, yeah, yeah, yeah!

And with a rack like that, You really should be glad!

 

You say that I’m a pig, You’re offended to the core

But girl your breasts are big, And the rest of you’s a bore!

And we love boobs!  So although might sound crass

We love boobs,   Now get on that stage and dance!  
OOOOH!!

 

We Love Boobs, yeah, yeah, yeah!  

We Love Boobs, yeah, yeah, yeah!

And with a rack like that,  You know you should be glad.  

With a rack like that,  You know you should be glad. .

Yeah with a rack like that,   You know you shoooo-ould…

Be Glad!!!

Yeah, yeah, yeah!!!   Yeah, yeah, yeah Ye-ah!!!

OH WON'T YOU SHOW YOUR CANS!

 

Oh yeah I'm, in New Orleans!  The place where every man

Can cry, out to woman,  "Oh won’t you show your cans!!"

 

Oh won't you show your caaaaaans!

Come on and show your cans!

 

Oh please!  I have beads!  About a million strands!!

They'll be, to you from me!  If you'll just show your cans!!!!

 

Oh won't you show your caaaaaans!

Come on and show your cans!

 

It don't take much to make me happy... inside...

A simple flash this animal... just goes wild!  

Just goes wild!  Just goes wiiiiiiiild!

 

Hey you, in that headdress!  Behind the sequined mask!

Those costumes, they don't impress...

We wanna see your cans!

 

Oh won’t you show your caaaaaans!

Come on and show your cans!

 

'Cause just one peek can make me swallow... my pride...

Nothing's as humbling as real life... Girls Gone Wild!

Girls Gone Wild!  Girls Gone Wiiiiiiild!!!!

 

Yeah Rue, Rue of Bourbon...   You make a boy a man!

Cuz you, got the women...   Who wanna show their cans!

 

Oh won't you show your caaaaaans

We wanna see your cans...

Come on and show your ca-a-a-a-a-a-ans!!!

WEAR A BRA!

 

There's a woman, who works next to me

A flower child, an old hippie

She burned her bra back in '73

And now she's succumbing to gravity!

Lady you should wear a bra!

You know you’re gonna trip and fall

Lady you should wear a bra,

Cuz lady your boobs droop!

 

Well she bent over to pick something up

And when she did, her blouse came undone

It was outrageous, like something I'd seen

In National Geographic Magazine!

Lady you should wear a bra
Your stomach's seen a coup de etat!
Yeah lady you should wear a bra
Cuz lady your boobs droop...

Teat---teat yer teat--teats sag! 

Lady you should wear a bra
Those things are on their last hurrah
Lady you should wear a bra
Cuz lady your boobs droop!

 

I stood in shock, embarrassed and flustered
Then she said “Well, did you get a good eyefull, buster?”
I was transfixed, I couldn't look away
And all that I could think of to say... was

Lady you should wear a bra
Yes you’re gonna trip and fall!
Yeah lady you should wear a bra
Cuz lady your boobs droop...
Teat-
--teat yer teat--teats sag!  

Teat---teat yer teat--teats sag!

Teat---teat yer teat--teats sag!

BREASTS ARE GREAT!

 

Breasts are great...

This is something I can't overstate

So with this song I shall commemorate

That I believe that breasts are great

 

Instantly,

My mood improves exponentially

When there's a pair hanging in front of me

Oh breasts are great, and suddenly

 

I break out in prose, over those

and sing their praise!

I've said nothing wrong, sing along!

'Cos breasts are great!

 

Breasts are great...

It's a statement that you can't debate

It doesn't matter if you're gay or straight

You must concede that breasts are great!

 

Why they cannot show, I don't know,

It's just that way...

Won’t you join my song, Sing along!

‘Cos breasts are great…

 

Breasts are great...

It's a phrase that I can't overstate

So with this song I shall commemorate

That I believe that breasts are great

HMMMMMMMMMMM-MMM-M, MM--MM-MMM!

YOU'RE GROWING BOOBS NOW GIRL!

 

You’re growing boobs now girl  

           (Yes, yes you’re growing boobs now girl!)

You’re growing boobs now girl 

           (Yes, yes you’re growing boobs now girl!)

 

I used to think that fatherhood was grand when my daughter was born

          (when his daughter was born)

Now maturation of the mammary glands has left me feeling torn

          (has left him sad & torn)

 

You’re growing boobs now girl  

          (Yes, yes you’re growing boobs now girl!)

You’re growing boobs now girl  

          (Yes, yes you’re growing boobs now girl!)

 

She asks me if I’ll take her out to shop so she can buy a bra

          (so she could buy a bra)

I tell her that this ain’t no job for dad, you’d better ask your mom

          (you better ask your ma)

 

You’re growing boobs now girl  

          (Yes, yes you’re growing boobs now girl!)

You’re growing boobs now girl  

          (Yes, yes you’re growing boobs now girl!)

You’re growing boooooooobs !  

          (Yes, yes you’re growing boobs now girl!)

 

You tell those boys to stay the hell away from you

          (My eye’s on you…)

Yeah

My gun is loaded and I’m not scared to shoot!

 

You’re growing boobs now girl!

You’re growing boobs now girl!

 

You’re growing boobs now girl  

          (Yes, yes you’re growing boobs now girl!)

You’re growing boobs now girl  

          (Yes, yes you’re growing boobs now girl!)

You’re growing boooooooobs !  

          (Yes, yes you’re growing boobs now girl!)

 

I’ll tell those boys to stay the hell away from you

          (My eye’s on you...)

Yeah!

What can I say, I was once an adolescent too….

 

I used to think that fatherhood was nice when she was still a child

          (when she was still a child)

But now I fear I’ll see her on an episode of Girls Gone Wild!

          (don’t go on Girls Gone Wild!)

 

You’re growing boobs now girl  

          (Yes, yes you’re growing boobs now girl!)

You’re growing boobs now girl  

          (Yes, yes you’re growing boobs now girl!)

You’re growing booooooooooooobs now girl!

          (Yes, yes you’re growing boobs now girl! )

MY BABY MAMA!

 

My Baby Mama, with the giant teats
That humongous belly came with 2 nice treats!
I love ya honey, just the way you was
But pregnancy has made you so voluptuous!

Cheesecake thighs and double-
-chin don’t impress
and I could live without the thunder buns
But as for those two sweater hams on your chest…
See how they’ve GROWN!

My Baby Mama, honey you’re the best!
Pregnancy has naturally enhanced your breasts!!!


SAX!


See how they’ve grown!!

My Baby Mama children can be sweet
Let’s have more so you can keep those giant teats!   


Mood swings and the food things you’ve been craving
The crying fits and knives that you have thrown
But I forget the ranting and the raving, when I
See how they’ve grown!!!

My Baby Mama, lady you’re the best!
With your naturally enhanced humongous breasts!!!

BREASTMAN!

 

If you need something off your chest

Your shirt and bra’s what I’d suggest!

 

Cuz I’m a Breastman - Yeah I’m a Breastman!

 

If you think yours may be too small

Don’t fret because I love them all

 

Cuz I’m a Breastman - Yeah I’m a Breastman!

 

Some men like eyes/... Brown, blue or green

Some men like legs/... with fetish feet

Some men like nice/... Personalities

But as for me/... I like your teats....

 

BREASTMAN!!

 

Your boobs are two things I adore

     Woo-woo!  Hear him whistle!

I wouldn’t mind if you had four!

     Woo-woo!, they’re so sweet!

 

Cuz I’m a Breastman - Yeah I’m a Breastman!

 

I have a vice I can't deny

BREASTMAN!!!

Your chest has got me hypnotized  

BREASTMAN!!

 

Cuz I’m a Breastman - Yeah I’m a Breastman!

Cuz they’re perky and bouncy and sweeeeeet….

                                              BREASTMAN!!!!

HOOTERS UP THE STREET

 

In the town I call my home,

There's a man next door to me

And he told us how his wife

Works at Hooters just up the street...

So we piled into the car

Delightful visage for to see!

And we opened up the door

To a room full of mammaries!

 

We all eat at the Hooter's up the street!

Hooter's up the street!   Hooter's up the street!

We all eat at the Hooter's up the street!

Hooter's up the street!   Hooter's up the street!

 

And our friends, they order more

Though we've all had too much to eat

Just to watch our waitress bounce...

 

We all eat at the Hooter's up the street!

Hooter's up the street!  Hooter's up the street!

We all eat at the Hooter's up the street!

Hooter's up the street!  Hooter's up the street!

 

Orange shorts and tight white Ts

It is such an enticing scene!

Mug of beer and plate of wings

And a room full of mammaries!!

 

We all eat at the Hooter's up the street!

Hooter's up the street!

Hooter's up the street!

We all eat at the Hooter's up the street!

Hooter's up the street!

Hooter's up the street!

We all eat at the Hooter's up the street!

Hooter's up the street!

Hooter's up the street!

WARDROBE MALFUNCTION!

 

String bikini

Nice push-up bra!

A Ginger shape in a Mary Ann top

Kinky new shirt

Really accents those boobs

 

But we hope that it will all fall out

In a Wardrobe Malfunction!

 

Cool boustier

That V--neck is hot!

Girdled waist sends it all to the top

Wonderbra scrunch

Gives her cleavage a boost!  WOO!

 

And we hope that it will all fall out

In a Wardrobe Malfunction!!

 

She might be covered now...

But one mistake and modesty comes crashing down!

Bare breasts upon your TV set...

But what a halftime show

To talk about!

 

Yes we hope that it will all fall out

In a Wardrobe Malfunction!!

 

Surprise is the best treat by far...

And what's discreet now holds such power

A severed strap or busted bra...

And she’s exposing, her Ta-Ta's!!

 

String bikini

Nice push-up bra!

A Ginger shape in a Mary Ann top

Kinky new shirt

Really accents those boobs... WOO!

 

But we hope that it will all fall out

In a Wardrobe Malfunction!

Yes we hope that it will all fall out

In a Wardrobe Malfunction!!

DOUBLE-Ds!
 

When I find myself depressed or sorrowed,

I open up this magazine
And Folded in the center… Double
-Ds!
And from those glossy pages she is gazing at me lovingly,
With glowing globes of bosom, Double
-Ds!

Double
-Ds, Double-Ds, Double-Ds, Double-Ds...
Bouncing globes of bosom, Double
-Ds!

When I’ve had a rough day at work,

I just hit the club right down the street
to see exotic dancers' Double
-Ds!
And though it may be fleeting, I will cherish every memory
For there will be enhancement!  Double
-Ds!


Double-Ds, Double-Ds, Double-Ds, Double-Ds...

There will be enhancement!  Double-Ds!

And when the night is lonely,

I just boot up my computer screen
and call me up some porno, Double
-Ds!
I right click on the icon of some woman who obviously
has an altered bosom, Double
-Ds!

Double
-Ds, Double-Ds, Double-Ds, Double-Ds...

Bouncing globes of bosom, Double-Ds

 

Double-Ds, Double-Ds, Double-Ds, Double-Ds...

There will be enhancement, Double-Ds!!

FAKE BOOBS!
 

Fake Boobs.  A surgeon can

Take a flat chest and make it bigger

Extend her mosquito bites into jugs

And makes friendly hugs feel so much better

 

Fake boobs may be man-made

But they look nice tucked in a tight sweater

No sin it’s just balloons under your skin

Once they’re put in it just gets better

 

No I don’t care about your brain, fake boobs, they reign!

You carry the world between your shoulders!

And if you weren’t blessed with big cans, well now you can

Indulge in some fine silicone boulders!

Ta ta ta ta ta, ta ta ta taaas!

Fake boobs!  So firm so round!

They’re the mounds that make my mouth water

Those saggers can get a brand new fresh start

Perfecting your parts to make them better!

 

So doctor don’tcha be a Scrooge, make those boobs HUGE

As if two gigantic wasps had stung her!

Cuz if you polled a million men, fake boobs would win

Eclipsing things like world peace and hunger!

Ta ta ta ta ta, ta ta ta taaas!

Fake Boobs, a surgeon can

Take a flat chest and make it bigger!

Remember, your man is only a man

And he loves your cans when they’re much bigger, better,

Bigger, Better, BIGGER, BETTER, YEOW!
 

TA TA TA, TA TA TA TAAAAS!  TA TA TA TAAAAS!

FAKE BOOBS!

                  COMING SOON:  BOOBEY ROAD!